Perfectionists constantly chase for ‘how things should be’ rather than accepting ‘how things are’. At the same time, ‘how things should be,’ keep changing.
Perfectionism is a set of beliefs about yourself and about your relationships with others that should be transformed and healed.
The origins of perfectionism are complex but it does seem to be linked to early experiences, parental styles of discipline and care providers who were never satisfied, or critical and demanding.
If it is just a perfectionist streak that you want to control, try the following steps:
• Identify the situations which you seek perfection the most
• Set reasonable expectations
• Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements
• Look at the whole picture
• Learn to set the standard yourself
• Embrace the value of mistakes
• Learn to move on from past events
• Enjoy the process and not just the outcome
• Be less critical of others
• Don’t compare yourself just to those more successful
• Focus on progress and not perfection
• Make sure you have a healthy work life balance
• Understand that you are not able to control everything
• Stop being so harsh on yourself
• Failure does not equate to lack of personal value
The burden of being a perfectionist goes above and beyond mere irritation. It is recognised as one of the contributing factors to other serious mental health issues and should be treated quite seriously.
We are all capable of good and bad work but we should not feel defeated or deflated every time we’re not able to do our ‘best.’ Bouncing back after facing a particular adversity and embracing resilience should be sought after instead.
Perfectionism is a set of beliefs about yourself and about your relationships with others that should be transformed and healed.
The origins of perfectionism are complex but it does seem to be linked to early experiences, parental styles of discipline and care providers who were never satisfied, or critical and demanding.
If it is just a perfectionist streak that you want to control, try the following steps:
• Identify the situations which you seek perfection the most
• Set reasonable expectations
• Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements
• Look at the whole picture
• Learn to set the standard yourself
• Embrace the value of mistakes
• Learn to move on from past events
• Enjoy the process and not just the outcome
• Be less critical of others
• Don’t compare yourself just to those more successful
• Focus on progress and not perfection
• Make sure you have a healthy work life balance
• Understand that you are not able to control everything
• Stop being so harsh on yourself
• Failure does not equate to lack of personal value
The burden of being a perfectionist goes above and beyond mere irritation. It is recognised as one of the contributing factors to other serious mental health issues and should be treated quite seriously.
We are all capable of good and bad work but we should not feel defeated or deflated every time we’re not able to do our ‘best.’ Bouncing back after facing a particular adversity and embracing resilience should be sought after instead.
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