By: Sara Arafa
Learn how to argue well. The trick is to never say anything that you wouldn’t want to hear said to you.
Research suggests you need five positive experiences to erase the memory of one negative experience. So give five kind words for each bitchy comment. Give five hugs for each cold shoulder.
Learn how to negotiate. Each of you states what you want, then both of you work together to find a way forward.
Accept the things that won’t change. Some characteristics about your partner are there for life – and you have to face that.
Learn to forgive. If you know you will never forgive your partner over something important, then give him – and yourself – a break and start again, with someone else.
Realize that the two of you will shift and change over the years. So, even if you think you understand him, or believe you have agreements sorted, check regularly – at least once a year – to make sure that neither of you has changed your mind.
Know when to leave. If your life aims are incompatible, there are heavy drugs or violence around, or if there is consistently more pain than pleasure, then walk before the relationship destroys you.
Don’t think that going to counseling equals failure. It can turn a bad relationship around. It can turn an average relationship into a brilliant one.
Learn how to argue well. The trick is to never say anything that you wouldn’t want to hear said to you.
Research suggests you need five positive experiences to erase the memory of one negative experience. So give five kind words for each bitchy comment. Give five hugs for each cold shoulder.
Learn how to negotiate. Each of you states what you want, then both of you work together to find a way forward.
Accept the things that won’t change. Some characteristics about your partner are there for life – and you have to face that.
Learn to forgive. If you know you will never forgive your partner over something important, then give him – and yourself – a break and start again, with someone else.
Realize that the two of you will shift and change over the years. So, even if you think you understand him, or believe you have agreements sorted, check regularly – at least once a year – to make sure that neither of you has changed your mind.
Know when to leave. If your life aims are incompatible, there are heavy drugs or violence around, or if there is consistently more pain than pleasure, then walk before the relationship destroys you.
Don’t think that going to counseling equals failure. It can turn a bad relationship around. It can turn an average relationship into a brilliant one.
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