By: Lizzie Cernik
Every girl needs to spend some time as a singleton before they settle down. It gives you the freedom to see friends, concentrate on your career and go on as many far flung exotic adventures as you can afford. But most people want to settle down at some point and that means taking on the dating game. If you’re starting to feel more like Bridget Jones in her PJs with a bucket of Ben and Jerry’s for company every weekend, it might be time to consider why you’re not getting out more.
Here’s some reasons why you might be avoiding dates and how to tackle the problem.
You’re scared
If you’ve had your heart broken before it’s easy to see why you’d be cautious about getting into the dating scene. After all, who wants to spend their evenings sobbing into their pillowcase after a great fling turns a bit sour? But if your fear of getting hurt is stopping you meeting new people, that’s not healthy either. There’s no need to rush into a relationship, but you could try organising a few dates. As long as you don’t take things too seriously, dating should be less scary and more fun.
You’re not making an effort
It’s easy to say the right man will ‘turn up’, but in reality life doesn’t have a magical fairytale formula. If you want to meet a great guy you’re going to have to put yourself out there- and that means taking a few risks. If dating websites aren’t your style, try taking up a hobby you’ll love or a new sport. You never know who you might meet.
You’re shy
If the thought of going out with someone you don’t know very well brings you out in a cold sweat, it’s probably putting you off dating. Overcome this barrier by suggesting your new love interests meet up with you and a group of friends on a night out. It might not be the epitome of romance but if you don’t feel comfortable with a one on one situation it’s a good way to break the ice.
You’re insecure
Some people avoid dating because they fear rejection or worry that men won’t like them. The brutal truth is that not every guy you like will want to be in a relationship with you. It may be that he’s got other complications in his life, or that he just doesn’t like you enough to spend the rest of his life with you. But this is absolutely no reflection on you, your looks or personality. Equally you’ll probably meet men who aren’t quite right, so just put your brave face on and be yourself.
Every girl needs to spend some time as a singleton before they settle down. It gives you the freedom to see friends, concentrate on your career and go on as many far flung exotic adventures as you can afford. But most people want to settle down at some point and that means taking on the dating game. If you’re starting to feel more like Bridget Jones in her PJs with a bucket of Ben and Jerry’s for company every weekend, it might be time to consider why you’re not getting out more.
Here’s some reasons why you might be avoiding dates and how to tackle the problem.
You’re scared
If you’ve had your heart broken before it’s easy to see why you’d be cautious about getting into the dating scene. After all, who wants to spend their evenings sobbing into their pillowcase after a great fling turns a bit sour? But if your fear of getting hurt is stopping you meeting new people, that’s not healthy either. There’s no need to rush into a relationship, but you could try organising a few dates. As long as you don’t take things too seriously, dating should be less scary and more fun.
You’re not making an effort
It’s easy to say the right man will ‘turn up’, but in reality life doesn’t have a magical fairytale formula. If you want to meet a great guy you’re going to have to put yourself out there- and that means taking a few risks. If dating websites aren’t your style, try taking up a hobby you’ll love or a new sport. You never know who you might meet.
You’re shy
If the thought of going out with someone you don’t know very well brings you out in a cold sweat, it’s probably putting you off dating. Overcome this barrier by suggesting your new love interests meet up with you and a group of friends on a night out. It might not be the epitome of romance but if you don’t feel comfortable with a one on one situation it’s a good way to break the ice.
You’re insecure
Some people avoid dating because they fear rejection or worry that men won’t like them. The brutal truth is that not every guy you like will want to be in a relationship with you. It may be that he’s got other complications in his life, or that he just doesn’t like you enough to spend the rest of his life with you. But this is absolutely no reflection on you, your looks or personality. Equally you’ll probably meet men who aren’t quite right, so just put your brave face on and be yourself.
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